As young people, we've all been in love at one point or another. Whether it's all the crushes in elementary school, love letters in secondary school, dates in university, or others in adulthood and beyond, we've all been there—it's something we can all relate to!
Anyway, back then we had the good times when love was a pure force and an essential part of life—when you could actually totally trust your partner, and when love led most often to marriage rather than just to tears and breakups. Young men would rehearse and sing love songs in deep baritone voices, writing heartfelt letters to one another wrapped in genuine romance, all pointing toward marriage. But now, love has fallen off.
Now we have toxic relationships where gaslighting, breadcrumbing, quitting, lovebombing, and triangulation are the order of the day.
We now have nonchalant men instead of traditionally caring and loving partners, along with pre-marital intercourse, breakups, tears, and pain. I believe there's still real love out there, but it's certainly not as common as before.
The major problem I have with this recent shift is the fact that love is now being seen as a commodity rather than a place of grace. What do you mean by "you cannot afford me"? What happened to mutual understanding, vulnerability, intentionality, affirmation, and all those beautiful moments? We have successfully converted one of God's greatest gifts to humanity into a specialized business venture.
You see a young lady turning a relationship into an adoption center. Don't get me wrong—as the intentional man I am, I love my partner and I am eager to spend on her and invest in our relationship. However, there are boundaries to it, which unfortunately a lot of young people do not understand.
Personal expenses and bills should be handled singlehandedly, as your partner is also a young person just like you, trying to get their life in order and starting out. Placing full financial responsibility on them is totally absurd! It's okay if your partner offers to assist—after all, God created us to be helpful helpmates to each other.
Furthermore, in my opinion, it is far better that your partner sees you as an asset rather than a liability.
Love should be a sanctuary of solace and happiness; you deserve to be happy in your relationship. No one deserves a broken heart, and the obsession with materialism is what drives that pain—because the men who can easily afford that lavish lifestyle often do not care, while the ones you feel cannot offer as much might actually be everything you need.
In my opinion, it's better to build together in a relationship than to only pop up when your partner is already successful. Doing that looks bad on your name—most people will view you as a gold digger, leaving your true character sidelined no matter how sensible you actually are.
It is far better to be a respected partner who helped build from the ground up than to be treated like a trophy and eventually sidelined just for chasing material things.
No comments yet. Sign in to join the discussion.