
According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, Rape is an UNLAWFUL (emphasis on that) sexual activity and usually sexual intercourse carried out for city [forcibly] or under threat of injury against a person's will or with a person who is beneath a certain age or incapable of valid consent because of mental illness, mental deficiency, intoxication, unconsciousness or deception.
Now in my own words I see rape as the utterly violent and disgusting act of having forced penetration and deriving sexual satisfaction with another person's body without their consent.
Rape is a serious societal issue which I feel has not been properly addressed to my satisfaction and to that of the African people. As a serious advocate for justice, truth and women's rights amongst others, we must not be silent, you see it may sound funny to you, till it's you or one of your own, we cannot wait for that before we champion the movement.
However before we go into the sorrow...
We must first combat the problem from the root. Now, who do I first blame? Now are the victims themselves. Now around the end of last semester I had a conversation with some of my female friends about this topic, and one of them was like women should never see themselves as the cause and they should rather blame men that cannot control their gbangolos [penises], we'll still come to that.
Men! My gender, my brothers, please as my friend Esther said, control your gbangolos, as a guy, I'm not perfect, I get those same urges too, but I learnt to control myself a long time ago, because as a man, one rape accusation, whether true or false, can ruin your destiny and life. So I trust you don't want to take such risks.
First things first, leave pornographic, nude or revealing materials. If the devil wants to ruin the life of a young man, he sends pornography first, then masturbation, and then he ruins your mentality not to see women as soulmates or life partners, but tools of sexual satisfaction, and then he gets them to do the evil deed. See that process? Truly the devil is a fashion designer, but no weapon formed against us shall prosper! In essence, STOP lust,porn and masturbation. We've all been there as young guys, but we mask it with male perfumes and masculine activities. We must run back to God and dust our Bibles, replace the vices with exercise, scripture reading and other positive actions, and according to Philippians 4:8, let's focus our minds on what is pure, good, and true.
Then our Parents! They trusted too much. Most nymphomaniacs, albeit they were interviewed, said that they were first exposed to sexual activities by family members or trusted friends they left us with them, and in their care, they seemed harmless, but within those smiles were evil intentions and plans. They'll start by introducing pornography, exposing children's genitals, and turn them into nymphos.
Then also parents can send children to anywhere at anytime. Have also exposed their children to dangerous people, lunatics, drug addicts, touts, conductors, cultists, etc. And most children sent on those dangerous errands are little girls undergoing puberty!
Haba!
Then parents who are too strict on their children increase chances of this phenomenon, because children need shoulders to cry on and safe spaces. These so-called confidants can mask their intentions, do the deed, and the child must endure because he cannot tell the parents about the incident.
Society and social media are two contributors that walk side by side. Social media is the fire, and the society is the smoke. Social media tells girls from 16–20 years of age that they need "a man" and not "a young boy" in their lives. Silly mentality—boys of someone's age are even better cause they can grow together, but creators online are distractors. Real lives have convinced those girls that a young boy should be seen as insufficient emotionally and financially to take care of them. Now those girls (as 18) who wanted men instead of boys now have baby boys with no fathers at age 28. See a script flip. Older men are more concerned about harvesting the virginity and body of these young girls—think of it as eating a mango. When you're done eating, you throw the big seed away. Same with older men. Then the society smokes away the once huge ego the victims had by stigmatizing, traumatizing, and mocking the victims, stripping them of the little self-worth they have left, leading to suicide or bigger problems. Then Social media tells women to expose their bodies and pressures them to wear trending stuff to make them look overly "attractive", I understand we want to look nice and trend but respectfully I feel it's best for women who don't want to be violated sexually or touched inappropriately, they should wear decent, well-covering and protective apparel that covers sensitive parts of their bodies
Finally, the government. These people are busy sleeping on the keg of gunpowder in the issue by not passing laws, encouraging legal reforms, and creating awareness and enlightenment on rape and its effects not just on the individual, but on the society at large. Its understandable that they work with non-profit organizations, local and international, to educate people. Rape should be criminalized in my opinion, and as far as I am concerned, a rapist, especially those who go for minors and children, do not deserve to live, therefore they must pay the ultimate price.
The solutions to these problems are embedded in the problems themselves; solving the problems are basically the solutions.
Mayowa Akintola-Daniels · Adeleke University, Ede
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