Life is so private that no one truly knows the treatment a man endures during a struggling marriage. Everyone talks about it, but no one pities the man when divorce happens. For divorcing her, he is always pictures as the villian, she is the victim.

Society points fingers at him, even before his side of the story is heard. But here is what no one talks about: she may have contributed to the breakdown too.

Yes, I am a woman. And I have seen it happen, I've witnessed cases of matrimonial distress up and close and what I've have noticed so far is that Society paints the man as the one who carries all the fault, even before the divorced is finalized. I'll highlight few instances, for example a couple of instances i have come across

• A wife who turned the hearth child against the father, not out of love, but because she and the father had issue whereby she used the child for emotional compensation and in so doing created a bigger problem in future. It is later discovered that the child will have little ot no regard for their father.

• Or a wife who lied about going to a mountain to pray to her husband and then absconded with their joint account savings and then files for divorce. No one talks about that, no one calls her out her

But let's pause and think before we blame the man, have we agreed what role did the woman payed? Was she respectful? Was she supportive? Did she also fail in her duties.

I Understand that there is this Gen z era whereby women no longer tolerate what their mothers endured in marriage but i just feel that it's going too extreme. Now I am not saying men are perfect. But let's be honest, women also contribute to marriage breakdowns, so before we blame the man, let's ask; what did she do? What didn't she do.

Marriage is a partnership. And when it fails, it is rarely one person's fault alone. Now, I'm not saying men are never wrong, they can be but I am saying that women should also be held accountable. Not out of hate for women but out of love for truth and fairness. Because justice, even in marriage should be balanced. In a marriage breakdown, is it always the men's fault? Or do we need to start having honest conversations about both sides?